I thought i'd run you through a typical Union game in a few lines,
1 30 men without necks take the pitch
2 Kick off
3 Ball kicked out of bounds
4 Ball thrown in from out of bounds
5 Repeat last two points a few times
6 Pack a scrum, have your ears ripped off by a toothless idiot
7 Get a penalty
8 Kick a goal
9 Repeat steps 2 through 5
10 Benefit from a terrible defensive mistake and score token try
12 Repeat steps 1 through 12 again for second half
Then you should probably start playing a real sport.
If you're forced to watch the game you should probably insert step 11.5 "Slash your wrists in frustration and anger"