Friday 10 January 2003

Do you have what it takes to be a member of a bizarre minor political party?

Screening question
Do you have any friends? [Yes/No] If answer is [Yes] then you don't qualify - sorry

1. Drugs are...
a) Wicked fun!
b) A complex social issue which we all must join together in order to conquer.
c) A plot by the Royal Family to keep this nation under their rule until the space aliens come and take us all away in their rocketship.

2. "The Leader" is..
a) Whoever buys the next round at the pub...
b) The Prime Minister
c) Sheik Ibn Zek - Lord and Ruler Of All Moonbeams (He likes to be called Kevin on formal occasions)

3. Your great uncle has died and left you $10,000. What do you do with it?
a) Go on the most epic bender ever seen in this country
b) Invest it sensibly and watch your portfolio climb over the years
c) Spend it on a one week trip to "The Leaders" positive enlightenment camp, a backyard in Upfield.

4. When you hear the phrase "Re-Educaton" what do you think?
a) You've never liked education and you're not starting now.
b) Rehabilitation is a vital part of the corrective system in this country and that's the way it should say
c) What you must do to the non-believers who are stopping your party from taking over the country and ruling it for the good of the earth, the sea and the sky.

5. Are the authorities hunting you down because only you, and the other members know 'the truth'
a) No, but they're hunting me for other reasons
b) No, because i've bribed all the authorities and they think i'm great
c) Yes, I know their secret about the moon landing really having been faked in a field near Colac.

Mostly a's - You may make the mistake of voting for one of these parties when you show up at the polling booth totally smashed, but you could never be bothered actually signing up.
Mostly b's - You're not already a politician are you?
Mostly c's - Yes, we know you'll be laughing at us when it's all proved true. But until then we'll do the snickering thanks very much.

No comments: