Ladies and gentlemen. The most sensational piece of sports marketing ever. So awful it's funny. I present to you the 1985 Chicago Bears in "The Superbowl Shuffle"
(CHORUS)
We're the Bears Shufflin' Crew.
Shufflin' on down, doin' it for you.
We're so bad we know we're good.
Blowin' your mind like we knew we would.
You know we're just struttin' for fun
Struttin' our stuff for everyone.
We're not here to start no trouble.
We're just here to do the Super Bowl Shuffle.
Well, they call me Sweetness,
and I like to dance.
Runnin' the ball is like makin' romance
We've had the goal since training camp
To give Chicago a Super Bowl Champ.
And we're not doing this because we're greedy.
The Bears are doin' it to feed the needy.
We didn't come here to look for trouble,
We just came here to do
The Superbowl Shuffle.
This is Speedy Willie, and I'm world class.
I like runnin', but I love to get the pass.
I practice all day and dance all night,
I got to get ready for the Sunday fight.
Now I'm smooth as a chocolate swirl,
I dance a little funky, so watch me girl.
There's no one here that does it like me,
My Superbowl Shuffle will set you free.
I'm Samurai Mike. I stop 'em cold.
Part of the defense, big and bold.
I've been jammin' for quite a while,
Doin' what's right and settin' the style.
Give me a chance , I'll rock you good,
Nobody messin' in my neighborhood.
I didn't come here lookin' for trouble,
I just came to do the Superbowl Shuffle.
(CHORUS)
I'm the punky QB, known as McMahon.
When I hit the turf, I've got no plan.
I just throw my body all over the field.
I can't dance, but, I can throw the pill.
I motivate the cats, I like to tease.
I play so cool, I aim to please.
That's why you all got here on the double,
To catch me doin' the Superbowl Shuffle.
I'm mama's boy Otis, one of a kind.
The ladies all love me
For my body and my mind.
I'm slick on the floor as I can be.
But ain't no sucker gonna get past me.
Some guys are jealous
Of my style and class.
That's why some end up on their (bleep).
I didn't come here lookin' for trouble,
I just get down to the Superbowl Shuffle.
They say Jimbo is our man.
If he can't do it, I sure can.
This is Steve, and it's no wonder.
I run like lightnin', pass like thunder.
So bring on Atlanta, bring on Dallas.
This is for Mike and Papa Bear Halas.
I'm not here to feather this ruffle,
I just came here to do
The Superbowl Shuffle.
I'm L.A. Mike and I play it cool.
They don't sneak by me 'cause I'm no fool.
I fly on the field and get on down.
Everybody knows I don't mess around.
I can break 'em, shake 'em,
Any time of day.
I like to steal it and make 'em pay.
So please don't try to beat my hustle,
'Cause I'm just here to do
The Superbowl Shuffle.
(CHORUS)
The sackman's comin', I'm your man Dent.
If the quarterback's slow,
He's gonna get bent.
We stop the run, we stop the pass.
I like to dump guys on their (bleep).
We love to play for the world's best fans.
You better start makin'
Your Superbowl plans.
But don't get ready or go to any trouble,
Unless you practice
The Superbowl Shuffle.
It's Gary here, I'm Mr. Clean.
They call me "hit man"
Don't know what they mean.
They throw it long and watch me run.
I'm on my man, one on one.
Buddy's guys cover it down to the bone.
That's why they call us the 46 zone.
Come on everybody, let's scream and yell.
We're goin' to do the Shuffle,
Then ring your bell.
You're lookin' at the Fridge,
I'm the rookie.
I may be large, but I'm no dumb cookie.
You've seen me hit, you've seen me run.
When I kick and pass, we'll have more fun.
I can dance, you will see.
The others, they all learn from me.
I don't come here lookin' for trouble,
I just came here to do
The Superbowl Shuffle!
(CHORUS)
(Applause)
It might lose something in the translation but it's almost the silliest thing I've ever seen on television. And I'm only 19 years late in blogging it too.
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