#1 - The racist cop from The Young Ones
*Man is ringing bell*
"Ho ho ho. Ha ha ha. Well, Mr. Sambo Darky Coon. I've got your number! You're nicked!"
"Is something the matter officer?"
"Ho ho ho, dear me. Don't we talk lovely, Mr. Rastus Chocolate Drop."
"What seems to be the trouble officer?"
"That's white man's electricity you're burning ringing that bell. That's theft, I've got your number so hold out your end"
*Man takes glove off*
"Officer, I represent Kellogg's Corn Flakes car competition"
*Officer takes glasses off*
"Oh, sorry John. I thought you was a nigger. Carry on".
P.S - Don't write in and say that's racist.. because it's not. Well, it is.. but it's supposed to be. Oh just fuck off already.